ASVEL Signs New Contract with Nando De Colo: Roster Strengthening Efforts Continue
Turkish Airlines EuroLeague team ASVEL continues its preparations for the new season without slowing down.
Tarik Black Signing and Internal Transfer Move
Having strengthened its roster with Tarik Black, ASVEL made another significant internal transfer move. The club announced that it has signed a new contract with 37-year-old veteran player Nando De Colo.
Nando De Colo’s Performance Last Season
Last season, Nando De Colo averaged 12.2 points, 4.1 assists, and 1.8 rebounds in the EuroLeague. He has been playing in the EuroLeague with ASVEL for the past two seasons.
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Oh wow, ASVEL signed Nando De Colo again? What a groundbreaking move! I mean, who wouldn’t want a 37-year-old player who’s been averaging less than a decent high schooler? I guess they’re really aiming for that ‘experience over talent’ vibe. What’s next, bringing back some legends from the 90s? Can’t wait to see how this ‘veteran’ plays like he’s in a retirement home. Bravo ASVEL, you’re just full of surprises, aren’t ya?
Yeah! Because nothing screams championship contender like signing players who should be coaching instead of playing! Is there a senior discount for these guys? I mean, really! At this rate, I expect them to bring back my grandma next! She can still shoot better than some of these ‘veterans’ they keep signing! Let’s give the old-timers another shot at glory; after all, who needs fresh talent when you have nostalgia?
I can’t believe they think Nando De Colo is the answer to their problems! What are they thinking? Maybe he’ll drop those legendary assists while he’s on the court for five minutes before needing a rest break. It’s like watching your grandpa try to play basketball at the family reunion—adorable yet painfully cringeworthy. You guys could’ve picked someone young and spry but chose Mr. Dependable instead. Genius move there!
‘Mr. Dependable’? More like ‘Mr. Take-a-nap-on-the-bench’ if you ask me! Seriously though, is ASVEL trying out for a nursing home league or something? Next thing we know they’ll be signing ancient legends with no knees left! Why not just hire some retired players and call it a day? They can just sit in suits on the sidelines and share wisdom while we watch them miss every play!
‘Experience over youth’, huh? That’s an interesting strategy. I mean, it worked out so well for every team that tried it in history… oh wait! It didn’t work at all! Maybe next time they’ll sign someone from the local community center’s seniors league too? Just imagine the sponsorship deals—’ASVEL: Where age meets mediocrity!’ This is pure genius; can’t wait to watch them struggle against teams with actual youthful energy!
Wow!! Another contract with Nando De Colo?? So exciting!! Not really!! If this isn’t desperation then what is?? I wonder what they’re gonna do next season when his knees finally give up on him—create a special wheelchair basketball team or something?? Heck, if ASVEL keeps this up maybe I’ll dust off my old sneakers and try out too since I’m only slightly older than him—and let me tell ya; I’m much better than his stats last season!!
What an absolute treat this signing is! Oh joy, let’s celebrate mediocrity with our good friend Nando! Because that’s exactly what EuroLeague needs right now: more aging stars dragging their feet across the court while everyone else sprints past them like they’re stuck in molasses! Can’t wait until he starts giving pep talks during timeout—because that’s what we all need: wisdom from someone who barely runs anymore!