
Former Premier League referee David Coote has revealed that he hid his sexuality throughout his career, fearing abuse and backlash if he came out as gay. The 42-year-old, who officiated over 100 top-flight games, shared his story in an interview with The Sun, following his sacking by the Professional Game Match Officials Limited (PGMOL) in December.
Hiding His True Self
Coote admitted that concealing his sexuality contributed to the challenges he faced during his career.
“I’m gay, and I have struggled with feeling proud of being ‘me’ over a long period of time,” he said. “I’ve received deeply unpleasant abuse as a referee, and to add my sexuality to that would have been really difficult.”
He disclosed that he told his parents about his sexuality at 21 and shared it with friends at 25, but he continued to hide it from the public throughout his career.
“I hid my emotions as a young ref and I hid my sexuality as well — a good quality as a referee but a terrible quality as a human being,” he explained.
Misconduct and Apologies
Coote’s career came under scrutiny after a series of controversies:
- November 2023 Suspension:
- Coote was initially suspended on November 11 after a video surfaced of him making derogatory comments about Liverpool and their former manager, Jurgen Klopp.
- Drug Allegations:
- Photos published in The Sun during the 2021 European Championship appeared to show Coote using cocaine.
- Coote admitted to struggling during this time, saying, “I don’t recognize myself in the cocaine video. I was under immense pressure and found myself escaping in a destructive way.”
- Alleged Match Fixing:
- The Football Association (FA) launched an investigation into allegations that Coote discussed issuing a yellow card before a Championship match in 2019, which he denies.
Coote has since apologized for his actions, stating, “I take full responsibility for my behavior, which fell way below what was expected of me. I’m truly sorry for any offense caused and for the negative spotlight it put on the game I love.”
Abuse and Safety Concerns
Coote also revealed the threats and abuse he endured during his career, including death threats directed at both him and his late mother. These incidents led to him having an accelerated response tag installed at his home to alert police in emergencies.
Mental Health and Recovery
Coote has since sought therapy to address his struggles, including his substance use, and is working on improving his mental and physical health.
“I’m guilty of what I did, but I’m trying to be the best version of myself now,” he said. He encouraged others in similar situations to seek help and avoid bottling up their struggles.
A Dark Period
Reflecting on the events that led to his sacking, Coote cited personal tragedies, including the sudden death of his mother and his uncle’s motor neurone disease diagnosis. He also struggled with the immense physical and psychological demands of officiating, managing over 90 games globally during the 2023-24 season.
Moving Forward
Coote expressed regret for his past actions but remains committed to personal growth. He hopes sharing his story will help others facing similar challenges and raise awareness of the pressures match officials face.
“To other people in my situation, I’d say seek help and talk to somebody because if you bottle it up like I have done, it has to come out in some way,” Coote concluded.
Conclusion
David Coote’s story sheds light on the immense pressures faced by match officials and the importance of mental health support in high-pressure professions. His candid admissions and efforts toward recovery mark a step forward in addressing personal and professional challenges.